Relationship and new normal
As the pandemic has hit us hard, the days are passing by. However, the certainty of life seems to fall astray. There is light at the end of the tunnel; how far not sure? There are so many things on my mind, yet not sure and there is hope, this is despair, there is regrets and something to share. There are unsung songs yet to sing, and there is still love… nowhere to give.
Everything seems surreal now, there are thoughts and fear now. The fear, the anxiety, it is not sane, the distances are felt, what survived and what did not is evident and lame. The process of making peace has started if not with others but surely for self. There was only so much so I could share as there are hidden treasures of thoughts which I despaired. I live now as this is my last day, but I believe I have still years to plan apart.
This time has made me think how much more could I have done, I could have spent more time with my loved ones, even if they had less to share, I feel I had more love than I spared. Just to be fair. This time is too priceless yet so finite. If only I would have read more books, listened more to music, spent time with the ones who matter, developed more patience life would seem to be fair. Yet I wish to survive, this time only to be more precise.
There was always next time, for self, loved ones, the family, the friends, everything else was a priority excepting me the person. Everyone who is cribbing about the time they have at hand, I am like, I love my company, I need to heal, recoup and repair. If it was not this now, I would not have realised there is so much to look forward to. I was stuck with stuff that doesn’t matter anyhow.
Money matters, but so does life, it is a balance and not choosing either side. Relationship matters if it is for you if it is toxic better without a few. The best relationship starts with it starts with you, enjoy your own company then find someone to share the view.
What we are facing is more frustrating as it is invisible, but still breathtaking. We are used to fighting wars, living and dying for something more like an actual cause. We dropping dead by the wind for no real reason or cause. It is easy to blame, easier to assume, easiest to opine. Does it matter when there are hardly a few breaths to spare?
The problems are real, but it is just switched priorities before you wanted something else now you need something else. Let’s not believe that people will find their eureka moment, you found yours, and so be it.
Now I live by the day hoping the miracle to happen. I am not sure if this is the last or tomorrow it is going to be real. But there is hope, peace and love that I have to share. Not that I have plenty, but now I know when it is not there.