Missing the Miss
One fine morning, I am still in my bed, my wife’s phone rings, with a jolt (cause you are half sleepy, you generally like things to be slow) I hear high excitement, suddenly the phone is on speaker and it was her best friend since childhood, she is getting engaged, wow that is great news (that time I was like, can I go to sleep). The catch she is getting engaged today! What? How on earth can you get engaged the same day as you are informing, like seriously! I was already looking for flights, before the call ended, I had already figured out the next available flight. I booked her flight and in haste all the packing was done and she was off to the airport. Hmm Freedom? Or Boredom?
Happened to be same guy, whom my wife’s friend was dating since some time, the guy was travelling back to states and they just wanted to make it official without any delay. Later I was thinking couldn’t these guy make up their mind some time back, or had to make an epic story (Like How I engaged your mother!). Everything happened to be fine. Now if that was a planned event would that had made any difference? I dont really think so, on the other hand the in the spur plan is good idea at times to rejuvenate.
When you are married and known to each other for years together, missing missing is not really a thing then, you get to be around, or you know that you are going to be around in a day or so and you have mentally prepared for it. However this time when it was all of a sudden, I was missing the Mrs. and had not prepared. So what next, work till you die and usual stuff, the next day I was like lets throw a party but when you are married and people around you are married above than that it is still like weekday, happens to be not so much of a great idea.
Ok then I realised, it is cool for 2 or 3 days max, but what next, like not that I was doing more long hours at work, on the other hand I was like lets move early. Anyway would be working later, not that great weekend, cause the day seemed to me more like when I was a bachelor nothing great achieved at the end of the day. The only other productive thing I did was to watch ted videos which anyway I would have watched. The idea is over rated when you are married you dont have time, on the other end I think when you are married you use your time more productively, cause you have things to do and not just procrastinate.
Again, longest study on human (Click here, what makes a good life? by Robert Waldinger) the conclusion is people who have healthy relationship with friends and family. Live longer have more fulfilling careers and happy. The reverse is also true when landed with a wrong partner though. The food for thought is are we giving weight age to the right things in life cause that is what ultimately is going to make the difference. Not just in the future but also today and tomorrow. Interestingly Fortune 500 companies in a study had suggested that most important thing for the CEO’s is to be learning and resilient. Learning is exploring new horizons. In a relationship as well you have to keep up doing something new. Freedom to Boredom is not a very long ride and you see your freedom turning into boredom every passing day.
If the above is not true, you need to think of exit plan (LOL). By the way Valentine’s Day is around the corner, instead of just making it great, think about making it personalised, memories and efforts are more appreciated than bought gifts. To have a good, great, awesome, awful relationship is upto you, remember humans are just not logical but psychological.
Happy Marriage to You!!